A pain you can’t describe

I don't know how to describe a pain so deep and so silent—the kind that you don't know how to tell anymore, because you force yourself to never speak about it, till you have forgotten what words are used to describe it.

It isn't the kind of pain that demand anger out of you. It isn't the kind of pain that demand tears from you. It's the kind of pain you live with everyday, where you feel its timbre when you are alone, watching the clock's hand move, while you stand still.

It's the kind of pain that learned to be silent.

It's the kind of pain that need to be put in words—

But you won't try

Because there isn't anybody to hear it

Or there's nobody who wants to hear it,

For it breaks them or confuses them

And it only hurts you more,

To know that even if you do try,

It will fail again and again.

So you keep silent,

Watch the clock tick,

While the pain fester within,

And one day

Somebody would ask why are you pale

Why are you not well

Why are you sick

But you still won't answer

Because they won't understand

Or they never want to.