Your Special Day

The tests all came back positive. My worst fears were realized. I never wanted to see the day I would have to say good bye to my dog. You're my first best friend. You gave the best kisses and snuggles. Your heart could brighten my darkest day. I wished you could stay forever, but we knew this day would come.

I took you to get a whole burger to yourself. We went to the park to run free, pestering squirrels, annoying birds, and chasing your favorite frisbee. We laid on a blanket, napping in the warm sun. I tried my hardest not to cry.

We drove out to the beach, the windows down as we drove. Your head stuck out, tongue in the wind. You sniffed everything, bounded through the waves, and dug holes for hours. The curving roads helped us to forget that this would be the last time.

Just one more ice cream cone. Just one more belly rub. Just one more. I knew I was being selfish. I saw how tired you were. I saw how you were hurting, though your tail wagged all the same. I just want to make these last few moments stretch just a little longer. Oh God, just let this moment last just a little bit longer.

And you were gone. I was left alone. I'm not angry at you. Please, don't think I could ever be angry at you. I know you are happy now, at peace and in no more pain. But it doesn't change that you're not here. My tears fall on unlicked cheeks. My arms are empty of your furry body. Wherever you are, I want you to know that you are the best good boy the world will ever know. And thank you... for loving me, too.