Trauma

I’ve practiced what I’d say to you

A thousand times again.

I lie awake

In bed

At night,

Just trying to pretend.

“Maybe I’m not broken

Maybe I’m not a toy

Maybe I can just be a girl

Who’s lying with a boy.”

But I close my eyes

And try to sleep,

Fight back the tears

Falling down my cheeks.

I play again

The script I’d say

If I ever

Got up the nerve one day.

And even though I’m safe now

With someone who loves me true,

Every post traumatic stress symptom

Will always be because of

You.