If Wishes Were Granted by a Dark Magician

I would wish your hair would fall out.

I would wish you could no longr eat whatever you wanted.

I would wish for you to run into every wall corner you came by.

I would wish for you to always stub your pinkie toe.

I would wish for your umbrella to always leak during a rainfall.

I would wish for your cellphone to always be on low battery.

I would wish for your car to always sputter.

I wish I could, I wish I would, but sadly

Dark Magicians wouldn't waste their time.