some final words

La tristesse durera toujours

Dear mother, father, brother, sister,

I love you with all my heart. I just wasn’t meant for this world, it's a mess and I know I am too but maybe that's why we aren't compatable. I hope I can find a place of peace and joy, a place I am child enough to live, yet man enough to survive. I love you - I hope you can truly believe me. Maybe on my journey I’ll find Jesus. Pray for me please, pray that I will. Pray I will find happiness somewhere else, somewhere where I won't hurt so bad inside - I want it all to go away. I want a new beginning. I am not afraid to die; I’m just so afraid of tomorrow.

To all my friends and loved ones, I ask of you one last favour: don’t let my spirit die. Remember me for the laughs and the good times, the thrills we all had together and the times we were vulnerable with each other. I hope I made a place in all your hearts and touched each and every one of you in a special way. I have chosen to die, but I haven’t chosen to be forgotten. I trust I will find a new world, a world without pain. I want you all to know I am not afraid to die, I just want to quit living. I’ll miss you.