Goodbye, Paris

i. 9am at the airport

I remember a year ago

When you went to France

And I wanted to tell you something but I didn't

Because I was afraid it would ruin your trip.

I told you a month later

And I still probaby ruined your day.

You remember it every time you see me.

You remember it, and how it hurt you

And now you pull your hand away

Every time I get too close.

It hurts me, too,

But it felt unfair not to tell you.

And we don't ever talk about it.

ii. 4pm on the plane to Philly

It's silent and all I can hear is European sirens

and how their backwards ring has become familiar somehow;

I wonder how long it'll take to forget them completely.

It's amazing to think that I've experienced so much

And now I'm just going to go back.

Back, and everything will be the same but different.

I'll still get nervous while ordering food,

But for different reasons.

Goodbye, Paris.

Goodbye, Eiffel tower and Notre Dame Cathedral,

Opera house, metro, Louvre,

Goodbye, statues

And goodbye to all the poems I lost

whilst walking through your streets:

words I remembered for a time

but was too tired to write.

Goodbye, 4pm.

Nights and days will be different now.

Hello, stress

I can't say I miss you

(you never really left.)

Hello, violin

I miss the sound of your voice,

I only hope my hands remember how to hold you-

Hello, friends, family

I haven't begun to miss you until now

but I'll tell you I missed you the whole time.

Hello, Love.

I haven't forgotten you,

not completely:

only

your face,

your eyes,

your

laugh.