Hey there, random proser. I have a question for you which varies based on your genetalia (you'll understand why in a moment; I promise I'm not sexist.) If you are biologically female, describe what a period cramp feels like. Or, if you have given birth, describe the pain. If you are biologically male, describe what it feels like when someone hits etc your family jewels. I understand this will likely make people uncomfortable. But I feel like many people have trouble describing pain and also, as writers, we write about tons of gory topics or *crude* things and thus are used to this kind of stuff (at least I think we are and I know I am.) Thanks for reading this and good luck.

Am I In An Alien Movie? Sigourney?

Giving birth? What does it feel like?

Ok... So...

You know that feeling you have when you're bound up in your bowels and you haven't gone in days and your whole lower half is one big ball of containment and bloating and fullness and just-get-it-out(!)ness and you have a constant desire to push but nothing happens?

Then after several hours of that, maybe imagine that your insides are trying to remake themselves, flipping and turning and turning themselves inside-out and outside-in and back again. And it feels as though your innards are being ripped and torn and mauled and kneaded by a giant gut-kneading monster who thinks your inner pelvis is made of Play-doh, right?

Multiply that by 5. Again. Again. Now by 2. Now by 5 again. Now double it.

That's ALMOST what being in labor feels like.