Eight Million Heartbeats

Eight million heartbeats.

I heard every one.

Each like a sunrise I had yet to see.

I knew they were coming.

They always came.

Until they didn’t.

Eight million heartbeats.

Music always rang,

Rhythm always kept.

Cast out silence.

I didn’t know the concept.

Until I did.

Darkness,

But you kept me grounded.

I felt safe, warm, secure.

You were there.

Always like a beacon,

Until you weren’t.

They would call you

many names:

Vanished.

Reabsorbed.

Weaker.

I would call you

Twin.

I would’ve called you,

if I could,

when those

eight

million

heartbeats stopped.

Too young for life,

yet I learned death,

I learned about:

Silence and

alone and

a different darkness.

For 26 years,

all I’ve had are echoes,

buried somewhere

underneath an

unconscious--

The only grave you

ever knew.

I carried you in my heart

when you were still

just a yearning,

just an off-handed remark

for someone

I didn’t know I had.

Some people don’t need as long

to make an impression.

After all,

you only needed

eight

million

heartbeats.