as you see me

i realized that i

kneading mirror images with warm hands

(and god-seeing eyes to lead them)

had molded the lips between my cheeks

made them pucker, butter, mush

i was thirteen when i'd let them drop

to hang like heavy fruits hang on trees

as they fill with water and bend the branches

i had not known that mouths were malleable

under certain chemical reactions

like one part hot tears, two parts self-hatred,

activated by time

by the six years spent

searching for myself in the silver behind

the glass; pouting to make myself

more bearable, more acceptable

I did not know

I would find myself today

deformed. demented.

my lips

hanging limp, hotly parted

cocked half-open and spilling

lean lines of crystal drool

that twinkle in Your black eyes

and leave You at Your knees

as i pass You on tar and asphalt streets

i earned Your submission

when i gave You mine