For Certain

“Two hundred and six years I waited. Two hundred and six god damned years. I was poked, I was prodded, mismatched, redesigned, manipulated, eaten from the inside out by fucking wasps! And still they glowed with undesirable pleasure, those things! I scream? I die. Speak? Torn apart. I move out of order? I was too afraid.”

“A light, a bright light, a blinding bright white light. Then I was encased by utter blackness. The sound of pressure being released, and a great crash that seemed to come from every which direction. And then a voice, “Simulation Complete.”

“A dim blue light blinked, black, blue, black, blue. “Simulation complete.””

“Another crash. Bustling, screaming. My heart, although filled to its peak with adrenaline, didn’t beat. I was petrified. I moved slowly to the light. A pounding came before I had the chance though. A voice, a voice filled to the brim with anxiety shouted something in a language I couldn’t wrap my head around, it’s not like it scared me, it just surprised me was all. So I ignored it. It didn’t last long. Because as soon as I slammed my hand down on that blue light, the door opened. sunlight flooded into a room. A room that I didn’t remember. Not the room I’d been in.”

“Everything was silent for what felt like hours, I hadn’t been scared of the voice, and I still wasn’t. But...two hundred years is a long time, and to see what I saw, it should’ve killed me. But I wasn’t allowed to die. So I walked to the door. Outside was a man, an old man. Grayed hair, wrinkles absolutely demolishing him, skin hanging loosely on his arms, cheeks, legs, you name it. He looked at me with worry. Then surprise. And finally anger. I didn’t have time to say a damn thing before he lunged for me, he looked puny, but he wasn’t. I couldn’t say now whether or not he was human, but his eyes were blue, blue like the light. But they were glazed over, he couldn’t see. He couldn’t see. I fell as he gutted into me, I must’ve hit my head, but I couldn’t tell you now.”

“He was one of those things. I didn’t remember what he was supposed to look like. But I knew what it was. I don’t know if they were human. But I do know that, looking back on it, there’s something that I must’ve missed.”

“I grunted and kicked, but he took me. Took me like I was a doll. “矿,” he said. And I don’t have a fucking clue what it meant, but he scooped me up and took me somewhere. I don’t remember exactly what happened after that, aside from the the fact that I’m here now. But, it’s something. I still have the scars from the operations. Stomach, back, neck, cheeks, arms. Every inch of my body was devoured by them. But I guess it’s over.” I took a deep breath and looked down at the paper in front of me. There was only thing written, but it oversaw the entire page. 矿. “So I looked it up. It meant, Mine, in Mandarin. I haven’t seen him since. But, I know what he is from that one word. And it wasn’t the last time I’d ever see him again. Because I know for certain, It wasn’t real. The scars weren’t there when I pulled up my shirt. And the memories are fading. But I’m still here, aren’t I?”