rattling.

I confess,

I am broken.

my heart rattles around in my chest

like it's lost its sense of stillness.

I hold my breath

and count to ten, trying to calm my deafening mind.

The world tumbles,

turquoise, crimson and black;

a kaleidoscope of colours trickling around me.

The concept of love and sex terrifies me beyond belief,

and because I'm not clutching somebody else's hand,

you think I am not normal.

But the horrors of my childhood, the memories that invade my already crippled mind

would confuse you too, would cause you to run away from a humans touch.

So I am fine,

I am fine,

I am fine.

I will rise from the ashes like a broken bird whose lost its wings,

and continue to strive to fill the emptiness with the words of my heart.