The Anti-Love Poem

Thank you for the box of treats,

Chocolate is my vice.

I read the pretty card with lace,

it was so very nice.

The flowers sent, smell devine,

roses, I adore.

What’s in that little velvet box?

I can’t believe there’s more!

You’ve spoiled me with all these gifts,

just for Valentines!

But wait, half the candy has been eaten,

the card contains no rhymes?

This bouquet is from the cemetery?

it used to be a wreath!

And this isn’t a real diamond ring,

you’re a liar and a thief!

I should have stayed with your brother,

he didn’t have your good looks,

but at least the friends he kept,

weren’t Morticians, pigs or crooks.