Not Quite Freefalling
The trouble with dancing on the edge of a cliff is sometimes you slip
You skid down the impossibly steep incline
Screaming and clawing for purchase when you realize no one's there at the bottom
Letting go and closing your eyes when the mirage of a safe landing comes again
Back and forth up and downÂ
Your hands and arms and eyes and throat are raw from this endless alternating drop and cling routine
Night 1 (and 2 if you're lucky as fuck)
happy sighing sleeping sweet dreams closeness everything's fine
Night 2 (or 3, see the aforementioned good fortune)
crying gasping can't sleep nightmare distance nothing is okay
And rinse and repeatrepeatrepeatrepeatrepeatrepeat
Why can't I stop
Who willingly stays on the cliff, letting it bleed them dry and gouge divots in their back?
Someone crazy mad fixated obsessed insane
Psychosis maybe?
Or just stupidity
I'll keep screaming and grasping and letting go in this dark to light and back again pulsating aching addicting fever dream
Because at this point I just don't remember what else to do
Someday you'll catch me
Or I'll hit the ground
Doesn't matter anymore